Pinterest Nightmare #220: The Remember Ring

Love is in the air here at The Dose of Reality.

No, this post is not “upcycled” from Valentine’s Day. (Although I wouldn’t put it past us.)

No, it’s not because our bloodstreams were flooded with endorphins when we realized we’ll be eating chocolate from our children’s Easter baskets in just a few days. (Although…YAY!)

It’s because next week I will celebrate my 20th anniversary with my husband, Robert. THAT’S RIGHT…2-0…TWENTY!

You might ask how I could possibly be celebrating my 20th anniversary when, according to Lucy, I only *just* celebrated my 26th birthday this week? I am a marvel! (And now you know why Lucy is my favorite child.)

But alas…it really has been twenty years of matrimonial bliss! I’m completely sure my husband would confirm how marvelous it is to be married to me—if he ever read the blog. As it stands, you’re just going to have to take my word for it that he feels like he’s walking on clouds every day.

As I was searching Pinterest for anniversary gifts, I ran across this fantastic pin that really speaks to the heart of love and marriage…

Pinterest Nightmare #320: The Remember Ring

Remember Ring

As pinned from alaskajewelry.com

This symbol of forever love is the Remember Ring. On the outside, it looks like an average wedding band. But on the inside, it packs the punch of a small furnace. Thanks to its patented “hot spot” technology, the day before your anniversary this ring gradually heats up to 120 degrees for 10 seconds every hour on the hour making it impossible to forget your special day!

Who knew that the CIA operatives fired for their “enhanced interrogation techniques” all found second careers as wedding planners?! GENIUS!

The Remember Ring comes in seven styles with three different finishes and is available exclusively for men. Why don’t they make women’s rings, too?

excited_golden_girls2

That’s a good one!

Now, you might wonder why they didn’t simply install a vibrating feature or audio chime into the ring instead of having it broil the skin. Oh, please! Do you think a little buzz or chirp is enough to entice a man to voluntarily walk into a Hallmark store or dial 1-800-FLOWERS? No way! It takes the mind-numbing pain of a scorching to accomplish that.

And really, ask any man which torture he’d rather endure– a little seared epidermis or facing his wife when he’s forgotten his anniversary (again)? Blisters heal in a few weeks, but an angry spouse can last a lifetime. It’s a no brainer.

So, if you prefer marital harmony over an uncharred digit, the Remember Ring is for you!

In the immortal words of Nazareth…

Oh, Pinterest. No…just no.

 


Comments

Pinterest Nightmare #220: The Remember Ring — 71 Comments

  1. I’d like to get this for my husband but not tell him what it does and just see what happens!!! HAHAHAHA. I guess I’m feeling evil today 🙂
    HAPPY 20th!!! Holy wow! You deserve some kind of award for being married that long!!! I hope you can get out and celebrate!

    • Bwahahahaha! That seems like the perfect deployment of the Remember Ring, Allie! I like the way you think! 😀

    • If you know where to look, you can still see the girls on the lanai every day, Robin! Thanks for being a friend! 🙂

  2. First off, Happy anniversary and second my husband thought he was clever getting our anniversary date engraved inside his ring, this company had nothing on that! Seriously, this had me laughing so hard I was crying and so have to show this to him now, too 🙂

    • If only it were so easy as a calendar reminder, Tara. Only a 3rd degree burn (or maybe the shock of a taser) is enough for some to remember. He’ll be hurting much more if he forgets the anniversary. ;D

    • YES!! Your husband has ten fingers, Kita…just load him up!! Birthdays, anniversary, honey-do list reminders. The sky is the limit!!

  3. It could go both ways in our house because my husband and I have both forgotten! *Hanging head in shame* One year my sister in law called to wish us a happy anniversary and there was dead air on our end…as we tried to remember what day it was. She starting laughing and said “you both forgot, didn’t you?” Sad…we’re at 22 this year.

    • You BOTH forgot one year?! Oh, I love that. Bwahahahaha! Well, it’s obvious you were made for each other. You’re a perfect match! 😀

  4. HaHa – love the remember ring!! Now, we need one that helps them remember to pick up milk on the way home:)
    Happy 20th anniversary next week – hope you have big plans for something fun!

    • I think they need to branch out and offer more daily reminder pieces of jewelry, too! My husband would never forget to take out the garbage if he got a heating before each trash day!

      We are doing NOTHING special. Lucy has dance and I think Bobby has a track meet that night. BUT we are hoping to do something fun when the kids are both at camp this summer…maybe.

  5. Oh, I need to get my husband one of those!!!

    Seriously. 10 years and not a single card. Nope, not a one. The first 2 years he “didn’t know it was a gift giving kind of thing…” Yeah.

    I mean, a few burn marks can’t be all bad, right? 😉

    • At the worst it would be a light branding that would be covered when he is wearing the ring. How bad could that possibly be?

      I love that your husband wasn’t aware it was a “gift giving kind of thing”. Bwahahaha. He gets bonus point for thinking fast on his feet with that explanation. 😀

  6. This clearly was designed by a woman! I have a feeling there man be a guy are two who despite the blister ring will still forget. For those guys a micro chip can be installed in the back of their neck that could deliver a “gentle” but invigorating reminder shock!

    • Bwahahahahahaha!YOU ARE SO RIGHT!! It MUST have been designed by a woman.

      I think you are on to something with the mircochip. Pets have been microchipped for awhile now. This is just the next step.
      A gentle but invigorating reminder shock” could be the tag line to this new product. You are a genius, Susie!

  7. Hahaha – I don’t have a husband yet but think I need to buy one of these -cause I think I could turn around and auction it off on ebay for BIG bucks as I have a feeling loads of us gals would agree with “Blisters heal in a few weeks, but an angry spouse can last a lifetime. It’s a no brainer”!!!
    Thanks Dose gals – I will share some of my profits with yall – that is if I remember!
    Ps. – Happy happy anniversary and CONGRATS on 20 years!

    • Thanks, Shashi!

      I think the perfect time to learn about this product is *before* you have a husband so you can implement it from the get go. Now you will be fully prepared!

  8. Good one Lisa. I like upcycled, I can see car dealers using it.
    This ring is funny, it must be a joke, no way a husband would ever forget his anniversary, right?

    • You are right, Bill. There is NO WAY a husband could ever forget the day he became the luckiest man in the world!! Most husbands plan their entire yearly schedules around the day!

    • Bwahahahaha. My husband forgot my birthday in 2000 when I turned 32. I didn’t even remind him that he forgot until we were going to bed. He was terrified I might kill him in his sleep. (He is no dummy) I’m totally over it though!…I only bring it up a few times a week now.

    • Me too, Kris. If I had an extra $700 lying around I’d buy one and switch it out with my husband’s regular ring and watch the fun begin!!

  9. Genius! I’d get my husband one but he could just remove the ring, unlike me whose chubby fingers have all but absorbed my own ring. Because that’s love. Of chocolate.

    Happy Anniversary!

    • My own ring is similarly absorbed, Liz. Love hurts. (And since they can remove a ring, maybe we should go with Susie’s idea of an implanted mircochip.)

  10. Happy Anniversary! We just had our 19th this month. My hubs NEVER forgets our anniversary due to an epic meltdown in 1998. We don’t do gifts, but I always get flowers & wine.

    • Flowers and wine sound PERFECT! I usually get a card from my husband, but never a premium card from Hallmark. But he does usually manage an off brand card from Walgreens. Maybe he’ll step it up during our next 20 years…bwahahahahaha.

    • Exactly, Angela! I already nag my husband to do all sorts of things and it hardly makes a dent. If a reminder doesn’t cause at least a LITTLE bit of pain, what good will it be?

  11. OK, so it burns you once, you grudgingly go buy the anniversary gift, then what? Is there an off switch? Or does it keep burning you for two days? Including every hour all night long? I could see this accidently falling in the toilet real quick.

    • You know, I looked into that very question. There is actually NO WAY TO TURN IT OFF. Once the searing pain begins, you just have to ride it out. Much like marriage itself.

    • That was very wise of you!

      My birthday is on TAX DAY so you’d think it could never be forgotten…but alas, my husband has managed to do just that. He is one that requires a negative feedback loop. Poor dear.

  12. ha! My anniversary is next weekend. We still have nothing planned, as per usual since we exhaust ourselves making things magical for the kids and the dog and not ourselves.. but we won’t forget it.
    At least, he won’t.
    ‘Cause I plan to buy him this ring if he does.

    • The world and family life don’t stop for our anniversary either. That’s just how we roll. Living the dream, baby. LIVING THE DREAM! 😀

    • It’s a TOTAL genius product! It provides help for remembering the anniversary but delivers a burning punishment either way. A wife devised this for sure.

      Happy Easter!

  13. This is hysterical … maiming your husband, so he remembers your anniversary! What’s next, a taser ring? I think the whack jobs that buy this are going to find themselves on America’s Most Wanted for knocking off their husbands for the insurance money!

    • After a bit, I’m sure the burning sensation in the finger can be ignored. A taser ring is the next logical step, Parri! You are a natural jewelry designer! Well done!

  14. That may be the coolest ring EVER! And congrats for letting him live for 20 years. Being in the 20+ but married verrrry young club too, I can confirm this is a huge milestone that should bring you AT LEAST a 7 day weekend at an exclusive spa. With daily massage. And calorie free drinks all day.

    • BOY do I like the way you think. Is it too late for me to put you in charge of all of my anniversary planning?

    • They should! They could make a fortune on the daily/weekly chore market. They don’t know what they are missing.

    • I am so glad that someone besides me appreciates the magesty of the Nazareth tresses.

      After 20 years, you have to keep the marriage hot somehow, Stacey! Actual fire is needed at this point. 😀

  15. I’m s bummed because my 21 anniversary just passed and I was wondering and wondering what I was going to get my husband! Well I guess there is always next year!! Lol! As always you guys crack me up!

  16. Bf is just planning on a wedding tattoo, maybe I should float this idea past him instead LOL
    (Actually he is great at remembering dates, but if it weren’t for the promise of cake and presents I’d probably forget my own birthday)

  17. Living the dream here, too. Sometimes I’m like “I’m good. You good?” It’s not that I don’t love what’s happening in between anniversaries but the pressure to make the most of a day – I can do without that. However, he did forget my birthday once and I think I could have just about asked for anything I wanted he felt so guilty. I got phone calls all day long, he didn’t figure it out until my sister called him about 9PM to let him know what was going on. That’s when I should have asked for something huge! I’ll bet I still could!

  18. I really like that it burns every HOUR… because men seem to forget things within MINUTES of remembering them, or being told something. Literally minutes. All the time. Every day. It happens.

    All the time.

    Every day.

    Now.

    do you get my point? Can HE hear me? Every DAY. ALL THE TIME!!!!!

    Can we please imbed more than one date? Like take it every night to set it for several things in the next day? It burns immediately he forgets to pick up a child, grab that gallon of milk, remember what our plans are after dinner?

    Oh WAIT! We need a remote control!! YES! We can implant the times it needs to go off that morning of EVERY DAY. And if there is still no ‘movement’ on their part, we can just BURN the CRAP out of his finger several times in that instance!!!

    That should do it.

    Girls, I think we are on to something!

    Yes Pinterest. Oh YES!!!!!

    LOL

  19. OMG, WHY?!?! LOL, I mean, it is pretty funny, but who in the hell would think that’s a good idea and further, what a way to remember the love of your life–by associating your special anniversary with a pain unlike any other.

    Ouch.

    Congratulations!!! I hope you crazy kids find a fun way to celebrate 🙂 XOXO

  20. They should also sell the cyanide filled tooth cap for the poor suckers who still manage to forget it. Make it a two for one deal.

    I’m lucky in that our anniversary, my birthday and Valentine’s Day all fall within one week.

    Happy 20th!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  21. Talk about being in the hot seat…Yikes! That cannot be ok! I don’t think I’d want a trip to the ER to treat severe burns on my anniversary, but that’s just me. 🙂

    Happy Anniversary! Hubby and I will be married for 14 years this May! Where does the time go?!?!

  22. Oh how I wish my late husband was still here. I’d order this little gem for him faster than you can say third degree burn. It reminds me of a delightful couple that used to rent in our neighbourhood. Sadly they have moved. Anywho, she constantly wore a dog chain around her neck. It was attached (yes always – well at least out in public. I wasn’t fortunate enough to see them ensconced in their own home) to a long chain that he wore attached to his belt. So heartwarming to see him drag, I mean lead her up the road. This is one chap who would NOT need this charming ring. Obviously she could just tug on the chain if he forget their special day …
    Happy Anniversary! Here’s to decades more!

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