This Column Is Going to Be Rated “R”

I was having a text conversation with a good girlfriend over the weekend about the movies we saw at ages that shock us today. Kramer vs. Kramer or The Jazz Singer, for example. Anyone remember a little movie called The Blue Lagoon? Know what I remember from it? Naked Christopher Atkins. Probably because I saw it around the time I was seven. Did your parents let you watch movies that you would never let your kids watch today? Share some examples in the comments

I have been thinking about the movie choices that my parents made for me and my sister, when we were children, and how totally inappropriate so many of them were. And these were smart, educated people, so what could they have been thinking?

Was it that the movie studios had not yet expanded to a PG-13 rating system, therefore slapping a PG rating on things that, today, would never merit such a lightweight label; or was it that they just didn’t think about how lasting the images of Jennifer Beals taking her clothes off for money would be on my eight-year-old brain?

These lasting images, by the way, occurred in the movie, Flashdance – a film my mother took both me and my sister to see when it came out in 1984. When I brought it up to Laura recently, how the main character in the movie was a welder by day and a stripper by night, she said, “Really? Yeah, that totally went over my head; I was just in it for the dancing.” And she was, to the point that for months afterward, she would put on leg warmers and apply masking tape to her little preschooler feet and dance the afternoon away in our foyer. I, on the other hand, was totally, completely aware of what I had seen and still to this day can vividly recall certain scenes that I am probably still not old enough to watch.

Let’s jump forward a year to a sweet, innocent kid friendly movie called, Jagged Edge, which quite frankly, by the title alone, should have let my parents know that it would not be an appropriate choice for me at age NINE; but there I was in the theater, with them, watching it as the film opened with a brutal murder.

My mother always used to brag about how I was mature for my age, but I will tell you that I didn’t feel very mature when I spent the next 3 months sleeping on a pallet on the floor, next to their bed. Because of the nightmares that someone was going to stab me to death, thank you (Mom and Dad) very much.

There seemed to be no thought process as to whether inappropriate language, sex or violence might be a good idea for us to be exposed to, at what anyone in their right mind would realize would be very impressionable young ages.

Laura recounted for me how she vividly remembers going to see Lethal Weapon 2 at age nine (What was it with age nine and movies with violence spelled out right in the title??) and how my mom attempted to cover her eyes during the totally naked sex scene with Mel Gibson and Patsy Kensit. Seriously, y’all, that is like me taking Emma to see something like The Fast and the Furious (or worse, like Monster’s Ball) next year. I am not even kidding when I say that I debated, for weeks, about allowing her to see the Disney movie, Prom, because I thought it might be too grown-up for her.

Here is the hypocritical part though, when my mother went totally double standard on HERSELF. When Top Gun came out in 1986, I was ten years old. Now Top Gun had all the makings of awesome for me; because, by that age, I loved action movies, obviously, since I had been watching them for years. So, I was ALL about seeing me some Top Gun.

Popcorn

And then my mother pulled the ‘no’ card on me. Say WHAT? She told me that after having seen the film (I am guessing this was an evening when they had managed to procure a babysitter?) with my dad, they decided that it was too adult for me to see, because – and hold on to your popcorn here, people – there was a KISSING scene between Tom Cruise and Kelly McGillis that was too graphic.

I am not even lying at all. This was her line in the sand. This, really? Kissing, with tongue? To Berlin’s Take My Breath Away? So, Jagged Edge, with murder AND sex was okay; but once the camera guy applied the soft lens and started the love-making music, the brakes went on. I am not exactly sure when I was able to convince her to change her mind, but I am pretty sure it was not while Top Gun was still available on the big screen.

I think it stands to reason that my mother would have argued that she was not doing anything that her own mother would not do, because, as it turns out, my grandmother took my sister to see Thelma & Louise when she was ten; and then, she promptly fell asleep, missing any chance to cover her innocent granddaughter’s eyes during the less than appropriate scenes that were coming her way.

And I guess it never crossed anyone’s mind that while covering our eyes may have shielded us from seeing the worst moments in these films our ears were still picking up plenty of future knowledge.

 

 

The Stars Are Just Like Us

We’ve always suspected, but now we know for sure:

The Stars are just like us…

They love The Dose of Reality!

But did you know we’re also perfect for election season?

Oh, one last thing before you go…

Head To Head: The ’80′s Edition

Let’s have some fun on this Friday, shall we? Summer is winding down, back-to-shopping is beginning to commence, and the luster of the Olympics is starting to wear off (even with my super, amazing, “fancy” big screen).

What better way to kick-off the weekend than a battle between two of the most iconic ’80′s movie heartthrob characters of all time?

Sixteen Candles and The Breakfast Club. Oh John Hughes, we miss you so. No one was able to capture the angst of being a teenager better than you (and Molly Ringwald, of course).

Let’s go head to head on this one, shall we? Jake Ryan vs. John Bender in the battle for your teenage heart. Who shall be crowned the ultimate ’80′s heartthrob of these two choices? This won’t be easy.

Jake Ryan vs. John Bender

First we have Jake Ryan. Oh Jake, you had it all, didn’t you? The perfect hair, the best preppy clothes, the sensitive soul, and of course those eyes, that smile, I am practically swooning while I write this. You didn’t need that Barbie doll girlfriend Caroline when you had Samantha waiting for you, just hoping that you would for once notice her. And notice her you did. When you leaned against your red Porsche waiting outside the wedding, my teenage heart almost burst.

But this is no cakewalk for you Jake. You have a worthy opponent in John Bender.

Bender, I can see you now with your smoldering, half-smile, half-sneer as you pretended to be so above it all. Your slightly dirty, but somehow still perfectly arranged bad boy hair, wearing your combat boots acting as if nothing mattered to you. Except for Claire, of course, because there was no denying the connection when you looked at her. Could a bad boy and a prom queen actually make it work? My teenage heart certainly wanted to think so.

So which one made your high school pulse race? Were you someone who went after the strait-laced, jock type or did you have a bit of an edge and look for the guy who would help you break some rules?

Not to leave out the many few men who read this blog (most of them related to me), what type of guy were you in high school (or which type did you wish to be)? Would we have found you hanging out with the cool crowd or in detention on Saturdays?

Tell me your choice in the comments and if you have a picture of yourself from high school, head on over to my Facebook page and share it. Think of that as your “extra credit” assignment!

Nora Ephron Made Me Think

When Nora Ephron died recently I found myself really sad, beyond the normal level of sad given that I didn’t actually know Nora Ephron. At least not in real life. But like so many people who watched her movies and read her work over the years, I felt like I knew her. Heartburn remains to this day one of my favorite movies, and I watched it several times with my mother, so Nora and my mother remain indelibly linked in my mind and in my memory bank.

I immediately wrote my friend Rene Syler over at Good Enough Mother and told her that I wanted to do a piece based on an article I had read about Nora Ephron. It really made me stop and think when I read it and inspired me to want to write my own lists. I would love for you to head over and share your thoughts on what would be on your own lists.

http://goodenoughmother.com/2012/07/doses-of-reality-what-will-you-miss-most-when-youre-gone/

 

Katy Perry: Part of Me

To say that we my girls were a little excited to see the new Katy Perry movie would be like saying that they only kind of like summer or think cupcakes are just okay.

They were pumped and pretty much woke up Friday morning asking what time we would be seeing the show, which is how we found ourselves in the first showing of the movie at our theater that day. Needless to say, they were not the only Katy Perry fans excited to see all the film had to offer!

I won’t spoil you mom moviegoers out there with the surprise waiting for you before the movie even starts, but let me just tell you that it will instantly transport you back to your childhood, in the very best way!

As a fan of Never Say Never, the Justin Bieber movie, I knew there was a good chance I would like this movie, simply because it was directed by the same producing team from that movie.

I was not wrong. To say that I only just liked this movie would be like saying that I mildly tolerate having a TiVo or find candy an okay snack. I loved this movie, y’all. I pretty much found myself crying off and on throughout for many reasons, in many moments. Could it have been hormones? Possibly, but I like to really think it was the impact of watching someone live out their dream on a big stage night after night. I like to believe it was about recalling the feelings of being a teenager and knowing the desperation her fans feel when they hear her music, when they stand in those arenas, when they simply breath in her air space. It’s that desperation of simply wanting, needing, to believe that this icon in front of them, is singing only to them, that she must somehow know how they actually feel inside, because they feel so connected to her. I could feel that quiet need coming from two seats away as I watched Emma watch the screen. I could feel her remembering what it was like to stand in that arena mere months ago and have Taylor Swift change her life.

For Abby, of course, the emotion was much more obvious. She mouthed the words, she danced in her seat, she gasped in delight each time Katy appeared on the screen in a new, more amazing than before costume. She became quiet and sad during the part of the movie that dealt with the end of Katy’s marriage, not because she truly understood what was happening, but because if Katy was sad, well then, by God, Abby was sad, too. She declared the moment the movie was over that she will be Katy Perry for Halloween and that she will wear the “chocolate” costume that Katy wears to greet her fans. She seems fairly confident that pulling this off should be no problem for me! Johnny Wujek, if you are reading this, let me know if you will be designing 5T costumes any time soon! ;)

I think the film is a fantastic treat for mothers and daughters, honestly for anyone who loves music. Behind the scenes concert films just add that layer of “reality” (since I know they are also edited, thank you very much) to the life of a musician that I don’t think simply attending a concert or watching an interview can provide. You truly get an inside look at everyone involved with the process and in the case of this movie, you especially get to know Katy Perry’s inner circle. Her sister is quite simply delightful and fantastic, and I found myself tearing up not just thinking of my own sister, but thinking of my girls and that sister relationship, which is truly a bond like no other.

The movie melds together so well the pressure, the pain, the glory and the love of performing at the highest level and all that it takes to get there.